ERIC MICHAEL JOHNSON
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"If the misery of the poor be caused not by the laws of nature, but by our institutions, great is our sin."
- Charles Darwin
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Mar 18, 2009

Battlestar Galactica Meets with UN


President Roslyn and Admiral Adama with cast of Battlestar.
Image: SciFi.com

As the popular show on SciFi heads towards its final episode Friday, President Laura Roslyn and Admiral William Adama met with a panel of United Nations officials last night (this is true) for a discussion of humanitarian issues.

This comes not a moment too soon. It's about time the United Nations embraced some new ideas that can overcome the permanent state of negotiation and lack of regulatory teeth in their General Assembly and Security Council Resolutions.

I don't know what issues were under discussion, but I can only imagine the topics included something like the following:

*Using FTL drives to transport emergency supplies into Darfur region despite President al-Bashir's decision to expel all relief workers.

*How Kamala Extract induced visions can be useful for predicting future crises and might also be fun at state dinners.

*Suggesting "cylon goo" as a means for the United States to repair its estimated $2.2 trillion in ailing infrastructure.

*How Israelis and Palestinians can be induced to get along by eliminating their "Resurrection Ship" that makes both think they can live forever.

*Encouraging embattled world leaders to adopt Admiral Adama's approach of binge drinking during times of crisis. Proven useful for overcoming such difficulties as: working with sworn enemies, handling the deterioration of your only means of defense, overcoming the death of a loved one, or just to let people know that you're really sad despite your permanently stern demeanor. The Japanese Finance Minister and French President have already led the way (not to mention the famous boozer Richard Nixon).

*How it's about time to tell the distinguished delegate from the great country of North Korea to go frak himself.

Battlestar Galactica Meets with UNSocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

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